Managing Emotional Triggers: Avoid Becoming a Human-Volcano
We've all had that moment — you're engaged in a conversation, and without warning, you're hit with an intense emotional reaction that seems disproportionate to the situation. But why does this occur? And what can we do about it?
Nowadays, the term ‘triggered’ is widely used, and in the context of this blog, refers to a strong reaction to something that reminds us of our past trauma, thereby causing distress and discomfort. Often stored in our subconscious, psychological triggers can lead us to make reactionary decisions based on heightened emotions; interfering with our ability to self-regulate.
Triggers surface in everyday situations and impact us on a deep level. For example, seeing a group of friends hanging out without you can unconsciously remind you of feeling excluded in high school, while someone’s tone of voice can take you back to moments when you were scolded by a parent. These situations unexpectedly stir up deep-rooted memories, leaving us emotionally charged.
While it’s important to explore the roots of trauma and honor our emotions in a safe space like therapy, we also find ourselves in situations where we need to remain calm, and keep our relationships intact. It’s not always easy, but through awareness, we can gain control over how we respond.
Let’s start by paying attention to changes in bodily sensations. If you notice you have an accelerated heartbeat, take a moment and ask yourself: “What am I really feeling right now?”. By acknowleding and labeling your experience, you create space between your emotions and actions, leaving room to make better decisions.
Pausing a moment to ground yourself is also helpful. By taking a few deep breaths (inhale for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts, exhale for 6 counts), or even counting to 10; you’re allowing your brain to mentally reset and shift out of ‘fight or flight’.
Focusing on your senses — like what you can see, hear, touch, and smell — can keep you in the moment. Hopefully, you don’t smell something weird in the process — but hey…anything can happen.
Lastly, remember to approach your emotions with compassion. I recommend speaking gently to yourself: “I give myself permission to pause and get in touch with my feelings”, “I’m safe with myself", "It’s okay to feel this way, but I don’t have to react straight away”.
Emotional regulation requires awareness and ongoing effort, but each step forward brings us closer to living in line with how we want to behave and treat others. The power to decide how you show up in this world is entirely yours.
If you find yourself struggling with emotional triggers, I am here to support you as a Psychologist and Certified Life Coach. Together we can navigate challenging emotional moments, and build healthier ways of responding.
References
Fisher, J. (2017). Healing the fragmented selves of trauma survivors: Overcoming internal self-alienation. Routledge.
Bonilla, S., Natarajan, M., Koven, J., White, L., & Lamb, S. (2023). The discourse of being ‘triggered’: Uses and meanings among counselling students. Counselling and Psychotherapy Research, 23(2), 551-562.
Hollins, P. (2019). Psychological Triggers: Human Nature, Irrationality, and Why We Do What We Do. The Hidden Influences Behind Our Actions, Thoughts, and Behaviors. PublishDrive.
